Almost every problem we have with people can be resolved by authentic, respectful communication.
Think about it. Your children. Your significant other. Your boss. Your parent. That irritating co-worker. The nosy neighbor. And let’s certainly not forget any relationship where conversations often turn to opposing views of politics, healthcare, or economics.
Authentic, respectful communication. It provides the warmth that is lacking. The compassion that is needed. The understanding that is so greatly desired, though not often voiced.
How do we learn this type of communication when our own opinions and perspectives are held with such strong convictions?
It’s really not that hard. But it does require empathy.
Loud Is Not A Language® (LINAL® for short) is a communication model I developed in 2016, birthed out of a conflict at a dinner table between strong Trump and strong Clinton supporters, just before the presidential election.
It’s truly amazing when you take a minute to think about it. Supposedly intelligent adults, raising their voices, spouting accusations, insults, and assumptions while thinking the more passionate (or loud) they got they might influence someone to change their mind. REALLY?
And then there were those who just got up and walked away. Can’t say that I blame them. It was an extremely uncomfortable situation. However, leaving the table doesn’t influence anyone either.
In order to be understood we have to take the time to understand. That’s what LINAL® is all about. It’s about dismantling the word LOUD and using it to bring understanding.
L – Listen without attempting to respond. Just listen.
O – Own your actions, experiences, and the biases that came from them.
U – Understand that the biases of others came from their actions and experiences as well.
D – Develop ways to move forward
Granted, this is simplified. Walking it out may not be easy. But it is simple. With a determination to be honest and authentic regarding your unique experiences, coupled with a determination to be compassionate and empathetic toward the unique experiences of others…it is possible!
If you want to learn more, sign up for a call I am having on 12/29/22 at 11 am CST. You can register here and I would love to talk more then.
At the very least, please consider the 4 steps of LOUD and begin to recognize your biases. That’s a good starting place.
Compassion grows from sometimes-painful self-honesty.
Brenda is a believer in impossible possibilities, in brokenness becoming beautiful, and in justice, mercy, honor, and power – with love perfecting them all. As a Speaker, Author, Mediator, and Professional Coach, Brenda is highly focused on the power of communication. Her confidence, clarity, and courage to transform challenges into victories were the catalyst for creating Loud Is Not A Language®, a communication model that is actually a challenge to transform you…building strong, resilient, respectful relationships at the same time.